Well this post discusses two things.
Football and friendship.
About 5 days ago I got an urgent text from my Godson’s mother just before midnight begging me for my email address so she could list me as a co-author on an application for one of her son’s college scholarship applications. I quickly sent her my address back and then immediately got an email from this particular scholarship.
In the email were very specific and formal looking instructions. And even preset passwords. All very official looking.
Anyway I figured I was basically a character witness. Answer a few questions, “Yeah, he’s a great guy.” And all that.
I had to click a bunch of buttons, “Yeah, he’s 100% accurate.” You know the drill.
Then I get to the section labeled “Comments” which I expected and “required” which I did not. I thought the comments are “required”? I was just gonna volunteer them but now I am compelled to testify?
Ok, you require comments I’ll give you all the comments you can take. Cancel any appointments.
Anyway what began as an awkward and trite sounding essay about what a great guy with great principles this kid was became what I relealized was both a tribute to a family close to my heart for about the last 30 years.
I knew if I could put aside a few hours to take a real genuine shot at this and maybe help this boy net $50,000 for a scholarship then I’ll reckon his dad could have picked a worse Godfather.
1. To your knowledge is the information that the applicant provided in the ADVERSITY QUESTIONNAIRE section of the application accurate?
To the best of my knowledge the applicant has demonstrated most accurately a clear ability to recall all of the major details of his life. Being his Godfather, I held him as a baby and watched him grow into a man. Being that my own son is one of his best friends from birth basically, I have spent countless hours with my Godson during every year of his life. I’ve watched stressful situations present themselves to him and seen him time and again handle them with grace and humility. He is a calm and determined individual who avoids all the bad alleyways in life.
Dakota Plemmons is dependable, consistent and loyal. He is kind, courteous, and supportive. He was a hard-working boy and has grown into a hard working man who sets goals and does not stop striving until those goals are met.
I was informed that there was a word limit to the applicant’s Essay section. To be sure, Mr Plemmons listed all of the major stressful situations that he has dealt with in his life. I would only add that with regard to familiar relationships, Dakota’s uncle nearly died from illness recently.2. To your knowledge is the information that the applicant provided in the ADVERSITY ESSAY section of the application accurate?
I witnessed Mr Plemmons on many occasions spending time with his uncle and lending support during this time. He manages to make very high marks in school, while also managing a football commitment to his school as well. Most student athletes might not have much time left after devoting such an enormous amount of time and resources to good grades and quality athletic performance. But Dakota did all those things and still made time to be there for and comfort his uncle. I believe Mr Plemmons is one of those young men who really does grow stronger with every challenge that comes his way.
Watching the applicant’s ability to overcome challenges has been like watching an Olympic runner jump hurdles. He is about to graduate high school and yet he has no smart phone nor does he see a need for one. Where many kids his age would be twisting their parent’s arm for a phone, Dakota is oblivious to any desire for that kind of distraction. He always puts his attention to the task at hand and barrels ahead. He clearly sees such devices as a way to escape from life. While he makes more than enough money to afford one on his own, he instead saves every dime he makes, seeing the need to build his nest egg early.3. How would you rate the applicant’s ability to confront and overcome their adversities?
Yes, most teenagers would rather harass their parents for smart phones and digital distractions. Dakota Plemmons instead chooses to face his adversities head on without any distraction. He is clear headed and sturdy. Facing the challenges and hurdles that life has thrown at him so far has convinced me of his mental and physical fortitude.
Mr Plemmons has always run toward any adversities in life and not away from them. When his uncle was sick in the hospital he could have just insisted on staying home instead of making that awkward visit that we all have to make at some time in our life. When we are in a room with a person and we’re helpless to do anything for them except make small talk and bide our time till we can say, “We wish we could stay but we really have to be going.”
I visited Dakota’s uncle in the hospital many times when he was sick there. No matter what time of day without exception, every time I visited with his uncle, Mr. Plemmons was either already there or he’d come walking into the room while I was there and wave and say, “What’s up.”
To my knowledge, he never missed a day visiting his uncle in the hospital. He never had “something more important to do.” He’d either come along with his dad or mother or he’d drive himself across town in his pickup truck to visit with his uncle. He gave as much if not more of his time to his mother and his grandmother when they were in the hospital. His devotion to his family is unparalleled in my own life. My own family is scattered and our contact with each other is sporadic even though there are more of us in my own family.
It was Dakota’s father I probably have to thank for me not going down the same road that others my age did. At just the time that I was exposed to drugs and alcohol I was also exposed to Charles Plemmons. Me and Dakota’s father became fast friends. Spending time with Charles has honestly never been anything but organic for me. It is as natural and as comfortable as something as mundane as watching tv. For this reason, Charles was a great counter-measure for me in my formative years.
Instead of experimenting with drugs or alcohol I found myself instead embarrassed by those kinds of activities. The Plemmons family became my escape from the chaos of my own home life. His family was by contrast very strong and well put together and I envied him. Neither him nor either of his two brothers experimented with drugs or alcohol. They didn’t run around chasing women or horsing around. They liked fast muscle cars and football and they liked to work hard and avoid trouble. They went to church every Sunday and still do.
I say that to say this: It is categorically true that these same traits and qualities have been passed on to the next generation. I could just say that about Mr. Plemmons and just expect the reader to take my word for it but I would rather lend support to the statement with some anecdotes. While riding home recently on a Friday night after just having watched a football game that Dakota played in, Dakota’s father and mother were bragging a bit on Dakota and his sister Savannah. I have the honor of also being her Godfather.
Charles was saying in a very serious tone,
“My children humble me. They say things to me that I just don’t see coming. Recently DJ rode home with a friend and met a family member of this guy who was a bit older. As I understand it the man started using some racial slurs casually. DJ said his friend looked very uncomfortable. I asked him how it was for him and my son told me it was all he could not to haul off and punch that guy in the face. He said he could not wait to get away from that person.”
I could tell from the tone of his voice how proud he was to tell me that. I know Charles was never like that himself but maybe more in a passive way. I got the impression that although Charles never did behave in that despicable way that a person with racial biases will, it nevertheless never occurred to him to be purely angry and hostile about it like his son was and to actively contemplate a physical confrontation over offensive language that someone was using.
He also told me,
“Savannah is the same way. The other day I made a joke about a homosexual and she stuck her finger in my face and told me, ‘You better not ever let me hear you say that again!’ I said, yes mam.”
He said , “I’m not sure where they get it. I’m a decent guy but I’m not an activist or anything. Maybe this next generation is just better than us.”
I told him, “They get it from you guys. Your kids are good people because you’re good people because you come from good people.”
Dakota’s mother Kim would probably disagree and say she was an exception to the mess of a family she had. But again she is an example of a person who overcame her circumstances and rose above them. She is an exemplary mother and a fierce one. I don’t believe I know a mother more outspoken about her passion and pride for her children. She is a den mother known to let you know each and everything that is special about her children and of all their accomplishments and while she has been known to exaggerate slightly from time to time, I recently got a lesson in some of her objectivity.
She had been saying all season long about how the football team just adores Dakota. He is a backup for his football team and rarely gets to put on his helmet and go in. But Kim insisted they just think he is a great guy and an asset to the team. I kind of dismissed it at the time only because though Dakota has always been a great kid, he also been known to be socially shy at times. I just wasn’t aware of any side of him at the time that might lead me to think he was a leader or at least a great and loyal follower.
Several weeks ago I got an education. Toward the very end of a football game our team was winning handily, the coach called up Dakota finally in his first varsity appearance on the field on a Friday night in front of all the lights and the fans. I was in the stands running my mouth as usual and not paying very much attention when Kim started jumping up and down and shouting, “They’re putting DJ in! They’re putting DJ in!”
Sure enough we looked toward the field and saw him running onto the field. I just jumped up and started running down the steps to the fence behind the team. And when I got down there I heard something I’d never heard before. All up and down the line of players you could hear most of them shouting out heartfelt encouragement...“Come on Dakota!! Go get ’em Dakota! You got it Dakota!!!”
I kind of stared in amazement for a moment. I wondered, “Do they always cheer for the 2nd stringers and I just don’t hear it in the stands?”
’Nah..., ” I thought. My friend from the Bluffton Bobcats, Matt got me and Chuck, and DJ a sideline pass to one of their games several years ago so we were there on the side of the Summerville Greenwave football team. I didn’t recall them calling out or cheering on anyone from their team particularly.
I stood and then looked up into the stands at his mother and then back down at the team again. I thought , “She doesn’t hear them cheering her son on. They’re gonna love this.”
On the 2nd snap after he went out onto the field he ran around the pocket and tackled the runner runner from behind. It was all a fog to me. His parents could see what had happened but I was unaware until they called out his number and name on the P.A. system and I pumped my fist!
Charles came running down and we high fived. Obviously he was even more excited than me. I got to tell him that Kim was unequivocal. The kids on team were cheering for DJ. He seemed as surprised as me but when we got back up into the stands and told her about the team pulling for him she just looked at me like I was ignorant and said , “Well of course they were! I told you.”
I say that to say this, clearly Mr. Plemmons has qualities even I haven’t seen blossom yet. He is becoming a man before me and hopefully leading the way and modeling a mature and responsible approach to life for my son as well who is a couple of years younger and a 2nd year JROTC student with plans to sign up in the marines. I consider this letter a warm up for maybe for one I might have the privilege to write for my son one day.
This question is almost too easy. The Plemmons family come from a long line of tobacco farmers who were the salt of the earth. They woke before the sun rose every day and worked until the sun went down in the fields. Listening to the family history, it’s not hard to trace a line of strength and integrity through this whole family that not only continues in DJ but is actually an evolution of it and getting stronger in the character of the Plemmons grandchildren.4. The Association seeks applicants who plan to pursue and complete a bachelor’s degree at an accredited college/university in the United States. How would you rate the applicant’s determination to obtain/complete a bachelor’s degree?
Dakota Jackson Plemmons is as able a person as I know. All his life he’s been an immensely focused person with a quiet burning pride in his heart. At every age he has gone through a period of intense interest in one thing or another. His first love was for cars. The first thing I think he ever drew was an outline of a car as a child. He loved matchbox cars and was fiercely protective of his collection, only allowing you to look but not touch. When he was probably 5, for his birthday I drove around town to all the dealerships collecting their new car brochures. And I put the entire stack in a big binder and gave it to him as a present. They said he did indeed like to sit and flip through his car book at times.
His second great passion was passed down to him from his father and that is a fondness for collecting and trading vintage toys. The father and his son do indeed enjoy having their collections but make no mistake, both of them are businessmen first and fierce competitors, even with each other. They’ve each been known to outsmart each other at times in the name of bagging the biggest prize.
This determination and drive culminated in it’s 3rd incarnation as a love of all things football. Once football took hold of this boy’s heart it never let go. He and his father and I have been driving all around the state for years watching football teams every Friday night. Mostly following our own team but occasionally hooking up with friends we’ve made around the state and driving to watch two teams play that we’d never seen, building some terrific memories. This hyper-saturation of nothing but football every Friday night from me and his father clearly ignited his 3rd ambition...to become a football player. It was just something he decided he wanted to do. He didn’t need to be a star. He didn’t even need a nod from the coach on any given Friday night. He just wanted to be a football player. He just wanted to be part of the team.
The call came late in life for him. Many of his peers had been advancing through the ranks of little league and middle school. When DJ arrived at Dorman, he arrived with a brand new idea. To be a football player. He signed up for try outs and managed to make the first cut. From there on he had just enough of an edge on the competition to make each and every cut until he was officially on the freshman team. He was not big at the time and he was probably not all that graceful or athletic compared to now, but he had the heart to go toe to toe with kids twice his size and strength and many more years of experience playing the game and he earned a spot along side them. Early his first year he had serious doubts about whether he’d made the right decision. His dad even told him one day after a brutal football practice, “You know, you can always quit. I’ll still be proud that you tried it out.”
Well Mr. Plemmons turned to his father and said rather uninspiringly, “Nah, I think I’ll just go one more day and see how I feel.”
“From what I can tell”, Chuck told me, “He just got used to it. Not sure there was any one thing that changed his mind or clicked for him. He just got used to being a high school football player.”
Every year he came back stronger and stronger and it was more and more likely that DJ would make the team. In his 11th year he had a decision to make. He could adjust his schedule so that he could be appointed a more prominent role on the team which would make his acedemic career suffer, or he could decide to go with a schedule that would fast track him to college but would set him back on his playing experience. His decision was an easy one to make. He’d set out to wear the Dorman High varsity jersey and helmet. He knew he was going to be a part of the team no matter what. So he pivoted from football to his new goal of the best possible college education he could achieve. He told the coach what he’d chosen to do and that he knew it would hold him back a bit but the coaches supported him. Sure enough he has spent a lot of time on the bench this year (except that he’s never seated, he’s always standing with his helmet in his hands as close to the coaches as he can get.)
His junior year was surely a special time. He would play football for the JV team every Thursday night and then Friday night he’d dial me up and ask, “So who we going to see tonight?”
Again, most of the time the answer was Dorman but some nights we might skip the Dorman game and go watch a different team. Maybe an upcoming opponent. I never knew but I always hoped that it might’ve made a difference to the varsity coaches to turn around on Fridays in some far away place in the state and see Dakota standing at the fence watching the Varsity squad after having been suited up the previous night. I would look up and down the fence most nights but if there were any of his other team mates there on Fridays there wasn’t many of them.
Despite his choice to exert more of his time on his studies and less of his time on athletics, he nevertheless continued to meet the demands placed on him by the team and easily earned a spot on the Varsity squad. In his first year as a Varsity player he was even chosen to be one of a few backups to travel to Alabama to play against them.
As previously mentioned in the third week of the season this year he got his first call as a Varsity player. On the 2nd snap he got his first official tackle as a Varsity player.
5. Please indicate below in a brief statement why you feel the applicant does/does not have both a desire and ability to complete a bachelor’s degree.
Briefly, as previously mentioned, the applicant has achieved every goal he ever put his mind to. If I could just get the boy to pick up an electric guitar he’d become a rock star.
Without a doubt and honestly, his biggest challenge has always been his ability to sit down and do well on a timed test. He knows the material but stressful situations such as tests put a strain on him. It will be his biggest challenge at the University level but one that I don’t doubt he’ll be able to overcome.6. What do you feel the applicant’s biggest hurdle will be in pursuing and completing a bachelor’s degree?
DJ is mostly a quiet and shy person. He’ll offer a smile and polite conversation but unless provoked into an interesting conversation he’ll usually sit or stand quietly. His ability to fit in at a family get together and social events and also be part of a high school football team mean that he knows both how to be casual and friendly and also respectful and disciplined.7. Please briefly describe this student’s interpersonal skills and ability to present him/herself in a social setting.
So that’s about it.
That’s what I have to be thankful for this year. A family unit that is intact. An extended family that is somewhat intact. And a second family. The Plemmons (West View Greenhouses)
