Midpoint Snap

[DeCav]

Introduction:

Who am I?

I dunno.

Let’s see...

[DeCav]

Random Thoughts:

Why do people complain if make a long post?
You know what I do about 99.99% of the written words I encounter in a library or bookshop? I ignore them and their siren song begging me to take them off the shelf and give them a look.

Asked my mom once, “Why do you draw that long line on personal checks after you write in the amount?”

“So that a thief cant cheat me out of more money.”

I always wondered how that would have worked anyway....

“Forty Three Dollars and 33/100...and four thousand more dollars.”

??

I deliberately leave a long space after the amount. I dare someone to mess with my checks.

Which reminds me...people! When you get a meal receipt after using a credit card, don’t just sign it. You’re signing a blank check. I get more of those while delivering pizzas than any other type of response. Yes I’m technically delivering pizzas now. More on that later. But people, own your stinginess at least strike through the tip line before signing the receipt. You’re really testing my honesty.

[cavaliereagle]

Good point on the tip lines! I always mark through for that reason. I never put the tip on my card. I always leave a cash tip for tax purposes for the service provider.

[bringthewood]

Random Thoughts:

Why do people complain if make a long post?
You know what I do about 99.99% of the written words I encounter in a library or bookshop? I ignore them and their siren song begging me to take them off the shelf and give them a look.

Asked my mom once, “Why do you draw that long line on personal checks after you write in the amount?”

“So that a thief cant cheat me out of more money.”

I always wondered how that would have worked anyway....

“Forty Three Dollars and 33/100...and four thousand more dollars.”

??

I deliberately leave a long space after the amount. I dare someone to mess with my checks.

Which reminds me...people! When you get a meal receipt after using a credit card, don’t just sign it. You’re signing a blank check. I get more of those while delivering pizzas than any other type of response. Yes I’m technically delivering pizzas now. More on that later. But people, own your stinginess at least strike through the tip line before signing the receipt. You’re really testing my honesty.

A waiter almost toted an arse whipping' on Main Street for calling me out for striking through the tip line with the word NOTHING since he screwed our order up big time and didn't deserve the money. Funny thing is he pushed his luck and shanked our buddy eating with us with the 'add the 1 in front of the regular tip b/c he didn't put a $ next to his real tip.

Homey didn't realize the wife and me had worked meal service in a previous life and my girl don't play those games. We know good service when we see it and know when the server can't help the problem from others in the kitchen.

We walked back down and demanded to see management.... manager backed his buddy and 'assured' us that he was sorry and the waiter was one of his better workers but would talk with him still. I made sure to point out the weasel peeking out from the kitchen and the wife got the owner on the phone.

Long story, the 'manager' was simply the shift manager, and he was in on skimming the credit card receipts. Owner fired those 2 and about a half dozen others and offered to give us a huge gift in kind at the restaurant. Wife won't even walk down that side of the street anymore she was so pee-offed.

Story is:, manage the paper from your card like it was your card itself.... because basically it is your card.

[Rebel-Fan-74]

Good point on the tip lines! I always mark through for that reason. I never put the tip on my card. I always leave a cash tip for tax purposes for the service provider.

Agreed, cash is better for the server and safer for you. I had one "edited" on me one time. WILD WINGS CAFE and I called the manager and he said he would check on it, and sure enough, the server had done it at least three times... fired him on the spot and gave me the option to file a Police Report with his endorsement, to which I declined. I got my month back for the tip and the meal. I told him, I will pay for the meal, he wouldn't let me.

[DeCav]

Great stories!

The other moral is if you in the service industry, you’re gonna get stiffed from time to time, especially if you’re not at your best. Respect a customer who owns his decision by writing $0.00 or “none” or just a horizontal line.

What drives me nuts are the braindead customers. I’d circle the line that says total and circle the line where they sign. And ask them to please fill in both. I didn’t circle the “tip” amount because I don’t wanna come off as a beggar.

And people still just sign their name and hand me back a blank receipt.

Man it tests your honesty. Would be so easy to write a “1.00” there. They’d never know.

[DeCav]

More Random Thoughts:

I hate introductions.

I mean that is to say, I don't mind personal introductions or greetings. I mean introductions in books. Usually it's a non-fiction writer that feels compelled to put off the meat of a book for a few pages while they explain why they're writing this book, how difficult and challenging it was, and who they have to thank for making it possible.

I've already introduced myself to your book. I went into the bookstore, or library, or online store. I looked at the cover. I read the title. I noted the author's name. I saw all the critic's reviews about how freaking awesome this book is. I opened to the inside jacket of the book and read the summary. Maybe I even flipped to the back and read "About The Author" and I finally decided to get the book and read it. And now I have to read your boring introduction that almost derails my attempt to notch another book on my pistol grip.

So please stop writing introductions authors! We'll still love ya little brother.

Good Lord could you imagine if your favorite record albums all started with introductions?? Let's just rock. If it's a good book and you're a great writer and interesting person, the just insert your introduction in the appendix and maybe I'll feel compelled to read it if I haven't availed myself enough of the information provided within said book.

[DeCav]

Still Having Random Thoughts,

I know that a fart basically can be described as an event that is disruptive or funny in sound and in the olefactory sense, potentially able to strip the paint off of a highway lane but is ultimately a harmless, victimless event.

A shart however moves the situation up in it's seriousness and puts an urgency into our steps so to speak. By a factor of several times a shart is much more devastating and intrusive at any given moment in your life. Now there is a victim. The sharter. Surely in the animal kingdom the human reaction time to a shart must set some kind nerve cell speed record but alas it's not fast enough. Ultimately though, even a shart isn't the end of the world.

A brainfart also can be described as a disruptive thought or lack of it that might cause someone to feel embarassed or apologize for but again is almost always a harmless event.

This has lead me to wonder what a brainshart would look like. On the DefCon scale, where would it rate?

Maybe if a brainfart can be described as you forgetting the name of that movie you love so much, a brainshart could be described as forgetting your wife's birthday or anniversary.

This is a true philisophical conundrum for me. Why isn't brainshart a word and if it was, what would be it's definition?

This post! HA. Beat you to it.

[Rebel-Fan-74]

Saw a meme on Facebook that said,

You wearing drawers and blue jeans but that don't stop a fart,
and you want me to believe that little mask is gonna stop the rona?

[Rebel-Fan-74]

Why is it called a hysterectomy?
Shouldn't it be called a hersterectomy?